Patient Expectation vs Control

I have learned a lot about allowance. Allowing life to happen turns out to be the only appropriate stance in the universe that we have all co-created here.

Striving, fixing, changing, and trying to control life are soon seen, by anyone paying attention, to be ineffectual. That approach just doesn’t work. Never has.

Sure it can produce results if observed obsessively, but the results will always include restrictions, limitations, and rigidity. And these will almost certainly end in resistance, unhappiness, pain, and eventually if history teaches us anything, open revolt.

Trying to get a grip on things does not work because ‘things’ are not something that one can grip on. ‘Things’, or the Universe as we experience it, is a constantly changing and moving gestalt of a bajillion points of view and it cannot be ’controlled’.

On the other hand, allowing life to simply happen works great. It turns out that we not only ‘create our own reality’ but we create a reality that supports us and looks out for our interests.

I have recently turned a corner with this understanding with the help of much experience, many friends, and invaluable assistance from the ‘dead guys’.

After a difficult day yesterday culminating in asking my Source Self and my innumerable aspects for help, I woke this morning with a new energy. Without thinking, I gave myself permission to do anything I wanted.

Getting up, I asked myself what I really wanted for breakfast and we feasted on tea and buttered toast. Normally green smoothies with kale are on the menu. I felt great.

Next, I asked myself, ‘What do we really want to do this morning instead of the usual routine?’

Immediately I thought about kimchi. For some time now we have had a jar of kimchi in the back of the fridge that I have been afraid to eat.

I’m sure it’s okay, which is why we haven’t thrown it out. Fermented veggies never go bad really, they just become a little bit radioactive.

A trip to the Korean supermarket was the adventure that popped into my head, and within an hour and a half, we were back home with a big, fresh jar of kimchi and lots of encounters and wonderful experiences.


Practicing effortless mindfulness, one of Kris’ recent suggestions, resulted in some interesting insights. Of course, as I attempt to practice this, I drift in and out of mindfulness, and it was the process of coming back in that was revealing.

As I became mindful and present, my muscles automatically relaxed in a way that was noticeable. Being present and paying attention to what I was doing changed my physical body in noticeable ways.

I relaxed into the subway seat and looked around the car with a new focus. I released my concerns about getting a green light and noticed the people who were passing on the sidewalk.

I saw the panhandler on the street and, without judgment, wondered what he thought of me? Who was I in his universe?

Practicing mindfulness and being present released me from so many pre-conceived notions, assumptions, and patterns of response that the world seemed endlessly new and interesting.

Dinner was jasmine rice with steamed veggies and a generous dollop of kimchi. And it was spectacular!

Getting back to our theme, patient expectation of wonderful adventures that are going to fulfill our desires is a very nice stance to take in this reality we that have co-created together.

Trying to get everything to work out according to our ideas about what we or other people want has never been successful, and it is a tribute to our spectacular powers of rationalization that it even survives today as a seemingly viable option.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s